What's On My Mind? Well, here you go.....

When I log into Facebook it asks, "What's on your mind?"  I have half a mind to say what's on my mind. But then I don't really want the backlash for that.  So that leads me to this venue.  My Blog.  It's mine and since no one really reads blogs anymore I feel pretty free to say what I want.

I really hate it when people that are supposed to be your family and good friends, blow you off.

I'm talking about family that comes into town or passes through town and then you find out about it through seeing their pictures on Facebook or seeing them posted on the internet in various places.  And i'm not talking about distant cousins 3 times removed.  I'm talking about my children's grandparents, aunts and uncles.  Then they talk about how "we just don't get to see much of your girls" and I look at them incredulously and think to myself, "well, if you had stopped by when you took that trip to the coast last summer you may have a closer relationship with them."  But it wasn't important to them.  Or I find it crazy that we have family members that in the 20 years we have been married have rarely stepped foot in our home.  Some of them NEVER.  And these are SIBLINGS.  

I guess I grew up differently.  I was taught to cherish relationships because you never know when they are gone.  So it's hard for me to let go of those relationships sometimes.  Even though I know that they are one-sided.  I feel i should keep trying to keep those communication lines open.  

But I'm kind of done.

And then there is the category of friends.  This one is tougher.  I understand when friends come into town and they have a million people to see and they can't see everyone.  Completely get that.  But what I don't understand is when your friends come from another state and then go visit the Tillamook cheese factory but don't have time to visit you.  You want to go to the cheese factory?  Great, let's go.  I'll meet you there or we can go together.  I'm game for that.  Or you don't have time to visit us in Portland but you are going to Albany (which is an hour south)?  Great, I will drive down.  I'd love to hear your daughter speak. The same daughter that I read every single one of her letters from her mission and felt like I was a part of.  The same daughter that I sent a care package to on her mission. It's them saying, "hey, we don't have time to stop in Portland but we'd still LOVE TO SEE YOU.  Let's figure out something." That would have just felt really great.   I guess it feels like a bit of betrayal because I love this family and thought that they loved me back.  Chris and I almost drove 14 hours to be at their daughter's wedding three weeks ago despite it being our own anniversary.  

So yes, I'm hurt.

I consider my really good friends to be like family.  And I put these friends in this category.  But that is ME putting this expectation on people.  They obviously don't feel the same way.

So, Facebook, that's what's on my mind today.