Day 9: 21 days closer to Christ

We can grow closer to our Savior by following the words of our prophet. He has the keys. The invitation for this day is to FOLLOW. Follow our prophet. I have been reading president uchtdorfs talk, "Lord, is it I?"  It's a good message about becoming "good" as a good friend of mine said. By asking myself this question I am focusing more on my shortcomings and not others. I certainly have a lot of work in this area. But by putting up sticky notes in my house with this question on it I will be reminded to look inward. 

Follow the prophet. 

Christmas

It's exactly one week until Christmas.  I've been enjoying this Christmas season a lot.  It hasn't been stressful which is surprising considering that Chris had surgery, my mom is still recovering and the girls still have a lot of stuff going on.  But I've felt a lot of peace this year.  It's been nice to come home after I drop the girls off at school, settle onto the couch with my tea and the lights from the tree and watch a little CNN.  After about a half hour of the day's news I go back to my desk to get started on the day's files.  And even though I'm stuck at my desk for the rest of the morning and afternoon I am almost always done by 2:30 when I need to pick up the girls.  And that leaves the rest of the afternoon to get dinner prepared, talk with the girls, spend some time with Makenzie and Chris.  I did about 80% of my Christmas shopping online and so I havent had too many errands to run.  My home is decorated for Christmas but I didn't go overboard this year. When I ran out of horizontal space to put things I quit.  The Christmas lights didn't make it onto the house before Chris had his surgery.  The day he was planning on doing it he helped with a service project at church cutting firewood for families that need it.  I don't mind at all that it didnt get done.  What's more important anyway, some lights that profess your Christmas spirit or the real spirit of Christmas which is helping God's children?  Life has felt chill around here.  It's been peaceful.

Happiness is a warm blanket

You know that feeling you get when you wake up in the middle of the night and your blankets have come off you?  You feel cold and unsettled and of course you reach for those blankets to cover yourself back up.

That's how I feel.

I've felt the warmth if even for a small moment.

And I know it's there, it will always be there.

But for that moment in time when you don't have it....
it's cold.

Warmth...I love the warmth!

I need....I want....

I need to take a shower
I need to do something productive
I need to wrap presents
I need to figure out what's for dinner tonight
I need to clean my house
I need to read my scriptures
I need to do genealogy
I need to go to the temple
I need to do laundry

I just want to lay in bed......

It sounds like I'm depressed but I don't think so.  I'm in processing mode.  I've had a spiritual emotional growth spurt the past few days and it's left me with a lot to process.  And bed seems like the best place to process my thoughts.

This is what I know for sure:  God loves me.

The Horrors of An Old Journal

Tonight I read through a few entries in a journal from the late 80s to early 90s. Quite frankly I'm embarrassed. Who is that person? A sister in our ward gave her journals to her 12 year old daughter to enter into the computer. I'd never let my girls read them. They will read them when I'm dead. That's it. Seriously...it's awful. It was so disturbing that I'm left with a feeling of what in the heck has my life been about? I need to think on this for awhile. 

Peace out. 

It's about Baby Steps

The sun broke through the clouds today. It's amazing what that little but of sun can do for me. Work ended quickly today do I took Waverly on a walk. 

I've been working really hard at keeping my left foot straight as I take each step. And I noticed today it didn't feel as difficult as it once was. Baby steps I tell ya'!  But then I tried jogging. Uh....hilarious. I KNOW I looked ridiculous. I felt ridiculous. That needs some more work. Baby steps, right?